I have I have a long recording with Shenteria on my 2012 experience. I was just writing my happiness book and about the 0 to 10 happiness scale and discussing the terrible 0 level when I remembered another one of my episodes when I was playing a game (that seemed totally real to me) as I was apparently walking up and down the hallway. I would look into each of the patients and staffs eyes as I passed them and was somehow trying to determine how far they were along on this kind of self-actualization rating game that also was somehow interfused with Jesus and his atonement experience. I don't really know how to explain it, but I felt I knew that each human had to go through their own growing and maturity and finally to actually go through what Jesus supposedly went through in unbelievable pain, but in my kind of vision, when a person was about to start going through that it was like an eternity type experiencing the ultimate mental anguish and pain (like feeling a zero on my happiness scale and how I explain it). I had somehow already gone through it (for how every many years, which being a kind of dream state which doesn't now make sense, but it was as though it had been kind of a mini eternity of thousands if not millions of years). Anyway, I was so happy to have made it through but then I somehow had the ability to know when others might have to start going through it when I looked them in the eyes. I remember that somehow Meg was also there and I saw that she seemed relatively happy and I was happy for her, but then suddenly I knew that she was about to start her terrible experience (the one that I thought everyone had to eventually go through to end up having the unbelievable happiness and future life like Jesus). When I realized that I started to cry, knowing of the pain she must soon endure (and also somehow, having experience that myself already... and even seeming to have glimpses and memories of when I'd passed through it). I continued walking in the hall and notice 1 or 2 others that were getting close and also felt deeply pained for them. And I remember that, as was with Meg, that they were thinking that everything was good and that they were already had a high level of development and understand of maturity and self-actualization, but that they were mistaken and would soon understand just how much they still needed to learn and experience. I can't remember all of it and this has been a very crude way of explaining, but it was a very disturbing but yet profound experience, and I also felt great love for each person I looked at and truly wished them all the best AND wished that they could already be passed through this terrible mandatory experience, but knowing that they would have to.